Darkness Descends
The sanctuary is silent, save for the flickering of candles. My flock sits in solemn reverence, faces etched with concern. I stand before them, Bible in hand, a grave expression on my face. "My children," I begin, "dark forces are at work in this world. The signs of the end times are all around us."
I turn the pages, finding the ominous passages I've committed to memory. "The prophet Daniel foretold a future king who 'shall do as he wills. He shall exalt himself and magnify himself above every god, and shall speak astonishing things against the God of gods.'" My voice grows louder, more urgent. "And in the book of Revelation, we are warned of a 'beast' who will rule through deception and the power of technology!"
The Musk Connection
My eyes scan the worried faces before me. "And now, my friends, we have witnessed the fulfillment of these ancient prophecies. For the 'beast' has risen - in the form of Elon Musk, the tech tyrant who seeks to control our very minds and souls."
I raise the Bible high. "Just last Halloween, Musk appeared in public wearing a satanic costume - complete with an inverted cross and the sigil of Baphomet! This is no mere costume - it is a declaration of allegiance to the forces of darkness."
The Prophetic Timeline
My flock shifts uncomfortably in their seats. "We are living in the end times, my children. The book of Revelation speaks of a 'mark of the beast' that will be required to buy and sell. And is it mere coincidence that Musk is pushing for brain implants and a global digital currency?"
I slam the Bible closed, the sound echoing through the sanctuary. "Wake up, my flock! The prophecies are unfolding before our eyes. We must be vigilant, for the tribulation is at hand."
"The truth doesn't hide. It waits for those brave enough to look."
The Wise Wolf